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My mission, in a nutshell, is to give you the wedding that you want. You want to get married by a chick in full gothic regalia? Done. Want to get married by Slave Leia? Done. Want an Officiant who tells dirty jokes? Leads a pagan hand-fasting ritual? Dresses like Elvira or a zombie for your Halloween wedding? Reads the entire service in Klingon? Or who FINALLY gets to perform legal, same-sex ceremonies with simple beauty and dignity? (Thank you, Governor Cuomo!) Or maybe you just want someone who understands your lifestyle and thinks it's awesome.

You get the idea.

My standard fee is $500 (Monday-Thursday elopements: $250, Friday-Sunday elopements: $300), which kills me to have to say because I used to be a lot cheaper. *sigh* But I was so cheap I was actually starting to lose money by taking off from work to do the weddings, so I had to raise my rates before my family disowned me. Whatever. I'm still affordable. And personally, I blame you for not hiring me sooner.

Anyhoo, here's what's included in that price: 

  • all consultations, phone calls, Skype and in-person meetings; 

  • a rehearsal on a day/night that I am not already booked, if you choose to have one (in NYC only; an out-of-area rehearsal is something we can talk about);

  • a 100% personalized service, including any special rituals you'd like to include, like handfasting, candle lighting, etc.;

  • I will use a book for your service that you select, either from ones I already own or one that you provide. I will also go out of my way to find something you like or make something from scratch if the first two options aren't working for you;

  • I will accommodate almost any wardrobe request within reason, although I freely admit that I was asked to wear neutral lipstick once and it nearly killed me. (If I have to rent a costume, though, that cost is on you. To be fair, I don't think I would need much convincing to just break down and buy my own stormtrooper or pirate costume, but you get the idea), and finally;

  • An Emergency Reverend on standby, because shit happens...but I want to make sure it doesn't happen to your wedding.


Now, all that being said, I'm open to some negotiating. A hundred bucks and that sweet Fender strat you've been looking to unload. $400 and an open bar. Free if you or your significant other plays drums for my band.


Or something like that. We'll talk. ;)

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